When news of Sushmita Sen and Lalit Modi’s relationship began doing the rounds last night, we once again learned that there’s nothing quite like the scent of a new celebrity relationship to shake the internet out of its doom-scrolling stupor on a slow news day. With a single missive on Instagram, the fugitive businessman gave eager fingers plenty to scroll through by announcing his relationship with the pageant queen and renowned actor. In a series of snapshots from their recent vacay, Sushmita Sen and Lalit Modi are spotted looking loved-up against the idyllic backdrop of Sardinia and Maldives. The post generated over 190k likes (at the time of writing this article), and Modi quickly updated his profile picture along with his Instagram bio to reflect upon his newfound bliss with his partner: “Finally starting a new life with my partner-in-crime, my love @sushmitasen47,” reads the updated blurb.
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While the actor has yet to confirm the relationship on her end, the tidal wave of reactionary judgement that brewed on the internet won’t seem entirely unfamiliar to women whose dating choices don’t adhere to the norm. Particular lowlights include cheap digs about women being gold diggers—even as Sen’s prolific cinema career continues to thrive with her spellbinding performance in the acclaimed web series, Aarya—and locker-room-esque back-patting for Modi’s continued pursuit of the star after requesting her to “reply my SMS” in 2013.
No stone remained unturned in the online witch hunt, and it comes as little surprise that the star’s previous relationship with her 25-year-old trainer Rohman Shawl was soon dragged into the fray. While their age gap had previously drawn raised eyebrows, the internet’s judgement unsurprisingly changed on a dime, deeming the notion of dating a younger man more socially acceptable to a fugitive millionaire. The message is clear: if you are a woman, your choice of who you date will always be up for debate. Date someone younger, and you’ll be branded a cougar with her boy toy; date someone older, and you’ll be the opportunist after his wealth.
The notion acquires a sour aftertaste when the gendered connotations of the response are factored in. Showbiz is rife with evidence of men who have happily dated and married older, more successful women without having themselves branded as cougars. Indeed, age seems entirely disparate from male dating lives to the extent that Keanu Reeves was lauded for his ‘age-appropriate’ dating choice of the silver-haired artist Alexandra Grant. For the record, Reeves was 55 at the time, while Grant was 46.
Sen, who has always been vocal about her personal life and recently shared details on Twinkle Khanna’s chat show about the three times she came close to marriage but avoided a disaster, will likely address the relationship at her end, the buzz will eventually die down and the news cycle will move on once the internet finds a new headline to latch on to. However, the misogynistic policing of women’s dating choices will continue to loom heavy in the air—a bleak reminder of how agency over one’s personal life continues to evade the fairer sex. It’s 2022; love is hard to come by in any case and when we see others find it, can we wish them well—or leave them alone—instead of employing a particularly hateful brand of punch-down humour?
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